FUCK THIS BLOG (and all blogs, and everyone, everything, all mice included...)

It seems to me that this blog, like all blogs, started out as something inspired and upbeat and then decayed, as all blogs do, into confusion and inactivity and muddling of the point of it all. In that way, at least, I feel very much at one with the UNIVERSE, the collective unconscious, what it is to be human. And, thus, this blog has been littered with that eternal mating call of blogs, that "oh I'm sorry I haven't updated in forever and I promise to change that, starting NOW, this is a NEW DAY" thing. AKA the worthless promise of a fickle modern human. The inability to stick to something and keep at it and plug away. And I am that human. I am that person. I am no better than any other person, blogger or otherwise. The distinction for me being that my blog/s isn't/aren't even of any fucking interest to anyone, save maybe 2 or 3 friends. So I find myself doing that apologize thing and try to make up for laxness thing but the thing is...

WHO CARES???


No one.

No one is out there watching and waiting and caring and bumming that there aren't more posts on this or that of my stupid little blogs. And, in the meantime tumblr has kind of stepped in and taken over as the "new blog". The new thing we all start and then leave dangling endlessly and pointlessly and expect or hope or think someone else is going to care and take notice of and in the same time pinterest has come along and sort of one-upped tumblr. And somewhere in there is twitter. And the thing is

WHO FUCKING CARES???

No one.

None of this is reaching anyone. None of this matters in any way at all. We are all just reinventing livejournal over and over again and again and again in different ways. And we all know where LJ is now. Alive, amazingly enough, but like, who gives a shit. Just like all of our blogs and tumblrs and twitters. Yes we're out here, they're out there. But who the fuck cares? I really don't at all. And I'm assuming few others do either.

So, that being said brings me to my point. Here's a post in this stupid fucking blog, that no one will read or care about, even I probably will never reread it. And its not one of those posts to proclaim that I'm suddenly going to get back on the horse and start posting all the time, because who fucking cares other than me if I do or not. And it's not a post to apologize to a faceless, invisible mass of non-existent people for not posting more, as if there are all these people out there just fucking hanging on my every word or notion. There aren't. And to anyone else out there that puts themselves thought this same shit, let me assure you. There aren't.

LET'S NOT SHIT OURSELVES.

We are talking to ourselves and that is it. That is all. The only person that cares about these shitty little self-obsessed things we create is ourself, ourselves, is me. Is you.

So this is not for you. I don't know you, I'll never know you. And moreover, more to the point

THERE IS NO YOU.

There is only me in here. So I'm going to act accordingly. This is for me. For better or worse. This is just me, talking to me, with no point whatsoever. I am not going to pledge to blog more or to update more or to be more on the ball. I am not going to promise to overhaul this thing. I am not going to try to "get it back on track" with its original intentions and I'm certainly not going to continue in the same vein that it had gotten into. I'm not going to make any of those stupid teenage life changing proclamations about how this is a new day and a new year and I'm going to shake out the old webs and start over and start new and blah blah fucking blah. Basically every last post on every single fucking blog in the world. Honestly, find any blog anywhere and it will have, as its last post, someone, like 4 years ago, saying that they're sorry and that this is the start of something new and pledging to keep at it and plug away and be consistent, after not having posted for over a year. And as I mentioned, that will, I guarantee you, be the last post on that blog, and it will be from like 2009. And that's fine, that is what it is, that is who we are and that is certainly who I am. I'm no better than the rest of the dross and the dreck out there. So why bother to say or do it if that's the case. Why bother to put it out there in the public, on the internet. If it's so for you Brian, why type it up at all, why not just think it or put it in a little journal and be done. I don't know.

And that's all I can really say at this point about this, or anything. It is all the same, it is all one thing, nothing is different, we are all the same things made up of the same things, doing the same things and failing in the same ways. All I know is that

I DON'T KNOW.

And we are all in the same fucking boat.
Whether that is a curse or a blessing, I have no clue.



 









NOW YOU ARE LIKE ME.





























it is 6:27am.
this is the seance.
























xo